Friday, February 16, 2007

Love of my Life?!?

Yesterday I found my Valentine!*

(The rasberry Zingers, which are woefully underrepresented on the Internet -- I would have photoshopped out the donuts if I knew how to do it, and wasn't lazy).

I had never tried these Zingers before – though my mom, sister and I were seriously obsessed with Zingers during my childhood – because I didn’t like coconut, wasn’t too into raspberry, and in general though they were gross. But I tried them yesterday, mostly out of curiosity and because the vending machine did not have yellow Zingers.

They are wonderful, amazing, and in the running for Love of my Life (you can enter to be in the running, too. Just use the comments). There goes my “figure.” (those are ironic quotation marks. Since my current figure is nothing to talk about, I really don’t care! By the way, I love parentheses!)

* Just to clarify, I didn't sit home last night and eat ice cream and zingers and a heart full of candy that I bought for myself at CVS because I’m single. It was actually a coincidence that I discovered my new love on Valentine's Day. If I had to make a list of things I would have liked more than a date on Valentine’s Day, it would be long. And let's just say it would probably involve booze and inappropriate behavior with one or more cohorts. I compromised and had dinner, but no booze, with a few friends, because I am old and lame.

This is just a disclaimer to let anyone who doesn’t know me personally know that I am not one of “those girls,” whoever those girls may be. Especially because if I don't marry snack foods, I'll likely marry a gay man. I'm well aware that neither will give me diamonds on February 14th.

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

6... er, 3... Weird Things

We were tagged by Brooklyn Sea Hag:

The Rules : Each player of this game starts with the “6 weird things about you." People who get tagged need to write a blog of their own re: 6 weird things, as well as state this rule clearly. In the end, you need to choose 6 people to be tagged and list their names. Don’t forget to leave a comment that says “you are tagged” in their comments and tell them to read your blog.

Since there are two of us, we’ll each be contributing three. Unfortunately we are both too boring for six.

Also, we are cyberspace losers. We don’t have enough friends with blogs to tag 6 people, so we’ll tag 3. And I bet none of them will do it!

Here are my three:

1) I had an asymmetrical haircut in fifth grade. It was cut above the ear on one side and was long enough to cover my ear on the other. I can’t remember what the hell happened in the back. This is actually a well-known fact among certain circles (for example, my fifth grade classmates, and Boulos), but really must be noted. I think it was the first time my mom let me choose my own hairstyle after forcing horrible “mushroom cuts” on me, and man, did I show her.

2) When I’m free of schedule constraints and “the man” has loosened his grip, I am pretty much nocturnal. For example, quite often on a Friday night I will stay up until 5 or 6 am and then I’ll sleep until 5 pm on a Saturday. This is probably why, during the week, I have a tendency to oversleep. It’s difficult for me to go to bed before 2 am, even on weeknights.

3) Fuck, I am way too normal. Actually, that’s not true. But this blog is not quite as anonymous as it probably should be and I have a little brother and employers, etc. My first and last names are on this thing now (thanks Boulos!), so a lot of stuff has to be skipped. But here’s a decent one: in second grade, my locker was right across the hallway from the boy’s bathroom and I found myself frequently compelled to peek in when the door swung open. Being a good Christian child at a Lutheran school, I also felt compelled to tell my mother about this. I don’t remember her reaction at the time, but I do know that we now like to laugh about what a pervy kid I was. Of course, by third grade, I was charging for hand jobs in that same bathroom. But mom doesn’t know that.

I am tagging Tania (you’d better do it, I can think of about 20 weird things about you), Alice and Dave – but theirs is a wedding blog, so maybe weird things about them as a couple, or about their wedding – and Sarah, or technically the Waves.

Tuesday, February 13, 2007

My Next Career Move

Hello All!

This Saturday I spent about three hours doing some of the most amazing special effects makeup the world has ever seen. That's right, the Boulos siblings are involved in the production of the upcoming film, "The Unexciting Adventures of Unemployed Skeletor". The trailer can be viewed here.

So, Shane's part is that of Panthro, who has turned psychiatrist since the ending of his once popular 80's Cartoon, Thundercats.

In case you don't remember him, I will refresh your memory!

I, using my powers of ingenuity, turned a regular 28 year old musician/graphic designer into one of the most distinguished cartoon heros the world has EVER SEEN!!! That's right, my many talents continue to reveal themselves as time progresses, what can I say? I AM A CHAMELEON!

Alright... enough suspense though, I shall reveal my masterpiece...


I'm sorry, but if that isn't one of the most awesome things you've ever seen, I don't know what is.

Enjoy! The movie is coming SPRING 2007!!!!!!!! And yes, I actually earned a credit for being a makeup artist!! I should also mention that Shane's scene with Unemployed Skeletor (or Skelly, as he's known) is so f-ing funny, keep your eyes out kids! This shit is gonna be HUGE!


Tuesday, February 06, 2007

Might As Well Face It....

In an AOL article on Lindsay Lohan’s half-hearted rehab attempt, I discovered the following:

The Wonderland Center specializes in treating addictive disorders such as love addiction.

Awesome. I hope that is what she’s undergoing treatment for, please god let someone leak that information (I’m looking at you, Harry Morton). What I don’t understand, now, is the other patients and their constant bitching regarding her frequent field trips. Dudes, you people haven’t been committed – you are doing half-assed voluntary crap at a place that treats LOVE ADDICTION. Dicking around, especially by celebs, is to be expected there. You probably knew when you checked in that this place would be a waste of money. Chill out, or better yet, take a trip to the psych ward at your local hospital. A week there will straighten you out like no amount of time at Wonderland can.

Whiny rich rehab babies are not my only current obsession.
This story is. How absolutely insane is it?! My favorite parts:

Hartsfield said he couldn't recall the last time an astronaut was arrested and said there were no rules against fraternizing among astronauts.

Can you even tell astronauts what to do? They are astronauts for fuck’s sake! They’re like living legends, or actually a lot like unicorns. Have you ever seen an astronaut in person? I didn’t think so. But here is the best part:

Nowak raced from Houston to Orlando wearing diapers in the car so she wouldn't have to stop to go to the bathroom, authorities said. Astronauts wear diapers during launch and re-entry.

I take back everything I said about Wonderland; this is an obvious case of love addiction. I think we all know what the judge’s sentence should be.

Thanks to Boulos for pointing out the Robert Palmer connection I so ignorantly overlooked!

Monday, February 05, 2007

Daily Log

Something you may not know: Boulos and I spend a good deal of our "working" day emailing one another. We prefer this to instant message; I think we end up amusing one another more when we have to compose whole emails rather than type knee-jerk “ROTFLMAOLOLOLOL”s to each other. Anyway, this is how we KIT and continue to confide TMI in one another.

Today I decided to sum up “this day in the lives of Boulos and Amanda” in one of my final emails to Boulos. Keep in mind, we’re both a little out of it today due to the Super Bowl:

So today we have learned that data is good,* poorly written "medical" fluff articles suck, getting dirty rocks off is gross,** and we created our future euphemism for sex. Hopefully the sex won't be as mundane as the euphy!***

Oh, and you settled your debt**** (let's pretend it was mafia-related), but your teeth suck.*****

Kind of a mediocre day, but it had some highlights. Of course if it had featured Highlights, you would have loved it.******


* This might be more accurately worded as, “access to data is good,” as I was dealing with a non-functioning database. Having thought about it a bit, I think it’s actually a program and not a database. Oh well.

** Reference to Debbie, a woman with whom one of us works. Wanton sexual adventures are unattractive in a married middle-aged mother. Her habit of leaving early to partake in these adventures is not good form, but even worse is the TMI. The constant TMI.

*** A brief misunderstanding led to the mutual decision that we will one day, in front of our children, refer to sex as “trying to help him relax.”

**** (credit card)

***** Possibility of lower wisdom teeth causing chronic headaches

****** Boulos maintains a notorious, child-like appreciation of the magazine Highlights (also she loves books of Garfield comic strips, which is kind of irrelevant, but funny)

Thursday, February 01, 2007


The wife commisioned one of the most excellent pieces of art of all time, it's here!

Thanks, Joe!!!