Tuesday, November 29, 2005

And you said... TURKEY!!!!

Alright... it is about time for the Thanksgiving roundup, Jersey style. It all started with the grand tradidion of BIG WEDNESDAY, a sort of homecoming of sorts that takes place on Thanksgiving Eve. The Jerz peeps and I set out to the lovely Sun Tavern, in Scotch Plains, NJ to imbibe some alcohol and run into roughly half of my 1998 graduating class. I went out with Alice, her boyf Dave, and her friend from college, Hilary. Dave and Hilary were new to the Big Wednesday tradition, and were quite entertained by the unofficial reunion that happens there annualy. Man, the place was more packed than I'd ever seen it! We ran into Jay, who's a big fan of the blog, apparently, that bitch hadn't even told me he was coming to Jerz!! It was good to see you Jay, I hope you're proud to have made it into the blog. At one point I ran into Lindy, who'd been my next-door locker neighbor all 4 years of high school. That girl was always kind of weird, but she has COMPLETELY lost it since. I don't know WTF kind of drugs she's on, but she was fried out of her mind. I mean, she was worse than people I've seen on acid. At one point I asked her if she still had the trampoline a bunch of us bought her for her sweet 16, and her repsponse was screaming "Trampoline, Trampoline!" while jumping up and down. Ok, somehow this girl is in grad school right now, but she could not conduct herself like a sane human for five minutes, how is that possible?? Well, as I was at the mercy of Alice, my designated driver, I got home by a little after 1am, which worked out I guess, b/c I had to get up pretty early for Thanksgiving!

Thursday was the day I'd been dreading most, as the boyf was coming over to spend an entire Holiday with me and my family. It went pretty well, although his choice of stories included lots of drunken firemen times, which are always highly amusing, but seem to be an odd choice to share with my parents. They seem to like him well enough though, and overall a good time was had by all. My mom once again did a kick ass job making us an excellent turkey dinner. After the turkey naps, we had some dessert, and then it was time for Andy to hit the road, since he decided he wanted to go hunting on Fri. It was sad to see him go, but the debauchery would go on!

Now, although Wed. was "big" nothing rocked harder than my Friday night in terms of drunkeness or RANDOMNESS. Seriously. I met up with some of my old school peeps, I'd been friends with since the SEVENTH GRADE!!!!! FOURTEEN YEARS MAN!!!!! Oh man, good times were had. We started out in Cranford at the Riverside Inn, a cute lil' bar that was pretty popular. I'd never been there, but it was cool. We went there first b/c Liz was kinda sick and didn't think she'd make it out late long enough to travel to Hoboken with us. So after a drink we were picked up by Michelle & Michelle, and we were off to the home of frat boys, yuppies, and mobsters, Hoboken, NJ. We started by heading to the apt. of a whole bunch of peeps I went to high school with, but never really talked to. THery were all perfectly nice, just completely random. The apt is 2 stories and 3 people live there, 2 Lauras and this guy Jay (different Jay from Wed). One of the Laura's apparently lied and said that my friend Mari had told her Jay was looking for a place, when in actuality, she just wanted him to live there. This was quite the 3's company situation, as the whole night leading up to Laura's confession involved Mari asking everyone why Jay thinks she got him the apt. It was really odd... I digress though.
We ended up going to this bar 10th & Willow, where many drinks were drank, I danced w/Debbie, Mari, the Michelles, the Lauras, and Jay. I got mad drunk and proceeded to yell at randoms out the car window while on the way to the diner. Following the drunken nosh at UPD, best diner ever, I was dropped off at home @ 3:30am, just in time to accompany my Mom as she drove my Dad & bro to the airport. Nothing's better than being trashed and riding with your whole fam to the airport in the middle of the night, haha.

Sat was shopping w/ my Mom- she bought me fun stuff for my upcoming bday! Yay! Sun was chill, we made turkey soup, and then Andy came and picked me up to see him for a bit before it was time to return to the real world.

So, besides the fact that I woke up with a fever of 101, and basically feel like ass today here at work, I am happy to say that yet another Thanksgiving full of fun has gone by, and it really reminded me what crazy times I had with those high school girls! Those were some awesome Jersey Times, perhaps we'll have more fun times over Christmas!! Peace out, fools!

Thursday, November 10, 2005

Unemployment is fun... and SCARY!

Well, I'm back. It would seem that I've had all the time in the world these past couple weeks with which to update this, but sleeping late, watching tv, refusing to dress in anything more professional than a wifebeater, and... um, oh yeah, applying for unemployment while sending out resumes -- these things have really been taking up a lot of my time. As Boulos has already noted, I was unceremoniously fired from my 3-year stint at an evil reinsurance company that I will not name (except to say, you can figure it out by rearranging the letters of MTSR, LCL.). But it's not all bad news. As it turns out, unemployment is pretty generous. And I really did not want to die a claims examiner, anyway. Oh, and Ass Pirate was also fired (the alleged basis of our terminations, though I was not lucky enough to receive a personal explanation, was our emailing habits), so I have a friend with whom I can eat bonbons and watch soaps in my wifebeater. That is, if I wake up early enough to catch the soaps.

In any case, it is really much more important to go over the details of our Halloween. It seemed like Halloween should suck since it was on a Monday, but really that just meant an entire weekend of parties, followed by a Monday night out on the town. Originally I had taken a personal day on Tuesday so that I could avoid calling in sick (see: my St. Patrick's Day fiasco... hmm maybe I deserved my termination), but that was no longer really an issue.

We started off with Sarah's costume party on Friday night (the Waves). Here's a couple hot pictures from that:

I was a witch:

While Boulos was a dark angel:

Ironically, this was the first picture taken at the party, and Tania and Boulos are "pretending" to be drunk:

And eventually, the party became a drunken dance party (yes, this is what happens when a bunch of girls get drunk together -- but also notice that some of these are rack shots, since the one guy who stuck it out til the end got my camera for awhile):

And people were dancing on the table, too:

Saturday was our Halloween party, which was quiet fun and a bit wild. There was nipple-licking:

and the appearance of bare breasts (though I did not take pictures of that, as I am not this guy). I did, however, get pictures of guys staring at my breasts:

Catra was there, smoking like the slut she is:

And Brandon Flowers of the Killers made an appearance:

Well, ok, that's his doppleganger. Afterwards we headed over to Rudy's, where the wife pretended to lick me. Which may not be totally apparent in this picture, but she would kill me if I posted the one where it is more obvious.

We took Sunday night off, but Halloween was a blast. We skipped the parade and started out at a party in the east village, where we attempted dancing:

But the dj totally sucked -- he would play one song that would get the whole room on their feet, and follow it up with slow, strange nature sounds. No thanks, dude. So we left and went over to Barrow Street, which is kind of a Halloween tradition for us -- the west village is the place to go for good costumes. Unfortunately, I didn't manage to get any pictures of those. In fact, I didn't manage to get many pictures of actual Halloween. Whoops. Well, here's a crappy one of Boulos and myself, drunk at Barrow Street:

And that was Halloween. Which was followed by a relaxing week off, some drinking last weekend (despite a nasty cold that I developed), and more time off. Ass Pirate and I took advantage of the time off and went drinking Sunday night after a delicious feast at PJ and Archana's, but I find that drinking on Sunday nights is really more fun when you have to get up in the morning. Ah, well. Time for bed, as I actually have plans to do things tomorrow, things that involve getting out of bed before 3 pm. I have to fashion a robot costume for the weekly Waves party (robot theme), which I am way more excited about than I probably should be, as it represents a chance for me to leave the house and socialize with someone other than our bunny, or Boulos. YAY!


Monday, November 07, 2005

I Fought the Law...

What up?? Many life altering changes have happened for us unicorns in the past week. Amanda has lost her job, but I will leave it to her to update all you cyber fools on that subject. Halloween came and went, and our party was fantastic. The unfortunate event of the party was my drunken stumble, which ended with me falling chin first onto bun's cage. Despite the blood, I am fine, and clearly have not learned any lessons about my relationship with alcohol... which brings me to the events of Saturday November 5, 2005.
After spending a couple of nights in Jersey, Andy & I came in for a housewarming party for a friend of Amanda's. The girl, Mary, moved only a block away from us, so it seemed like it would be a fun and convenient night. Oh no... this was not to be. Andy decided to grab a beer for the road, and none of us thought twice about it, since the block between 9th & 10th is usually pretty dead at night. When we got to the the corner Amanda, Andy & Archana ran into the deli to get more beer to bring to the party. I stayed outside, holding Andy's beer, and, well, drinking it. I was already a little drunk, so it was kind of hard to cover up the beer bottle, being that it was a Miller High Life (the champagne of beers), it was pretty big to begin with. Some guys said something to me about drinking it, and I was quite brazen I suppose, but since our final destination was across the street, it didn't at all seem like a big deal. Oh man, I was wrong. When everyone exited the deli, I was immediately stopped by 2 cops. Unfortunately for me, they were under cover, and the one directly talking to me looked like he was about 14. So, when he pulled out his badge, I looked at it, said "Happy Halloween", and kept walking, however that wasn't a good idea. To summarize the rest- I got a damn summons for having an "open container", and spent most of my morning trying to figure out where to send the $25! According to this it happens all the time, and I could EASILY fight it, since they put the wrong court date on my ticket I would win, but who wants to take a day off of work to hang out in criminal court? Um, not me, thanks. So... if this ever happens to you, go here, and you will find all the forms you need.
As for the party that night, it was cool, the best part is the wall they allowed everyone to write on. I wrote a lovely haiku about my criminal experience, but I can't really remember it. At least I didn't scratch every other word out like Amanda did, LOL. Andy fell asleep @ the party, and we left. Not the best of nights, but one that will certainly go down in my personal history! haha.
As for Halloween pics, perhaps I'll get the wife to post some this week.
Until then, stay outta jail!
~Your fave jail bird