Tuesday, April 11, 2006

Old Time Rock n' Roll?

This is me:

This is me according to the AARP:

Ok... someone has got to help me out. For the past year or so, the AARP has been sending me mail at my parents house. My Dad and I shared initials, so I thought perhaps it was a mixup or something, and I never thought much of it until this weekend. All of a sudden they have tracked me down here in NYC! Now, I'm scared! As much as I'd like to retire after 3 years in the professional world... I am only 25! I CANNOT JOIN THE AMERICAN ASSOCIATION OF RETIRED PERSONS, SO LEAVE ME ALONE!

I have a good 40 years before I can taste the sweet nectar of early bird specials and hotel discounts! I do not want their geriatric jibber-jabber clogging my mailbox, wtf? Is their a name twin of mine missing out on elderly excellence? Is there some retiree getting free samples of young, hip products meant for me? WHAT IS WRONG HERE? Did I buy some sort of product for oldies that has gotten me on a list? Last time I checked I do not have a constant supply of orthopedic shoes and Ben Gay... so AARP, if you're listening, please leave me alone! Perhaps my move in 3 weeks will help me shake them for good, if not, I guess that soon I'll be hearing that feeble knock at my door once again.

Wednesday, April 05, 2006

Bleak, and Kinda Slutty

I copied one of these memes things from someone's blog (found here). You put your mp3 player on shuffle and it answers some very deep questions. It seems the main question it answers, with a resounding YES, is "is Amanda's mp3 player filled with crappy music?"

How does the world see you?
"I'm Gonna be (500 Miles)" by The Proclaimers. this tells us... I am committed? Possibly deluded? Or maybe the damn thing took this literally, and it's the glasses.

What Can I say, I'm a hottie.

Will I have a happy life?

"Molly" by Sponge. Apparently more like a life filled with teen angst.

What do my friends really think of me?

"You were always the One" by the Cribs. Well that's sweet.

Do people secretly lust after me?

"Jackie Blue" by the Ozark Mountain Daredevils. Not really sure about this but I'm pretty sure Jackie is a little slutty.

How can I make myself happy?

"You Might Think" by the Cars. Given that the lyrics to this song don't seem to be offering many clues, and I know the Cars are going on tour soon, I think I'm becoming a groupie.

Not that kind of car, morons.

What should I do with my life?

"Missing" by Everything but the Girl. Obsess over a lost love, and wander around his old haunts. Sweet.

Will I ever have children?

"Let Go" by Frou Frou. And give them up?

What is some good advice for me?

"Love Will Tear Us Apart" by Joy Division. I definitely foresaw this song appearing somewhere. Haha.

How will I be remembered?

"Mushaboom" by Feist. This is getting kinda boring.

What is my signature dancing song?

"What Katie Did" by the Libertines. Apparently I enjoy looking like an asshole.

What do I think my current theme song is?

"Too Close" by Next. I think I may have accidentally hit the "popular songs of the 90s button." In any case, this is awesome. Step back, you're dancing too close! I feel a little poke coming through...

What does everyone else think my current theme song is?

"Say Hello to the Angels" by Interpol. Well, this is one of my favorite songs, and the part about red hair is spot on. Yet it sounds like I'm about to be whacked.

What song will play at my funeral?

"Stellar" by Incubus. That is a nice gesture, but seriously guys, play something else.

What type of men do you like?

"Easy Like Sunday Morning" by Lionel Ritchie . All joking aside, this particular one is eerie.

What is my day going to be like?

"Band of Gold" by Freda Payne. Um... I'm gonna get married and then sleep in a seperate bedroom from my husband, without consummating the marriage? Wow I've got a big day ahead of me. And a certain amount of disappointment.

Oh gee, I opened my dayplanner to today's date, and look what I found!